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Books and Links

    If you find that miscarriage and loss books are mixed in 
    with pregnancy books at your bookstore, 
    let the manager know that this is a bad idea. 
    I have found that they will move miscarriage books 
    to "Women's Health" upon request.

     

    Deanna's Top Recommendations
    I have personally read these books and believe they are helpful.

    Davis, Deborah L. Empty Cradle, Broken Heart. Golden, Colorado: Fulcrum Publishing, 1999 revised edition.

    This is the book John and I read in the car. It takes you through every step of the grieving process, including moving on and trying for your next baby. It includes a solid section on what to expect both physically and mentally after a miscarriage or neonatal death. This book helped us a lot when we worked through it as a couple, instead of just me reading it. Click here for more information.

    Scher, Jonathan. Preventing Miscarriage, The Good News. New York: Harper Perennial, 1990.

    I bought this book way back when I was trying to get pregnant and was experiencing long cycles that I worried might be early miscarriages. It is very straightforward and I got much of the information for this website from it. It includes a number of women's stories to soften the rather clinical information. Click here for more information.

    Weschler, Toni. Taking Charge of Your Fertility. New York: Harper Perennial, 1995.

    This book is a MUST HAVE if you are trying to get pregnant. For the first time in my life, I finally understood what all my discharges were about, how to truly interpret my temperatures, and all those fine details that mom, doctors, and pamphlets enclosed with products never explained. This book will definitely help you get pregnant faster, or clue you in quicker if you have an infertility problem that needs medical attention. A life saver. Click here for more information.

    Molly's Rosebush by Janice Cohn. 

    A children's book that helps children deal with the loss of an unborn sibling. I bought this book for that day when Emily finally asks who Casey is. It is very nicely done, probably geared for the 3-8 age group, and has an introduction for parents. Click here for more information.

     

    Newly Released Books
    I only comment on those books I have actually read. A couple of them are not out yet.

    Furnia, Molly and Dunnewold, Ann. A Piece of My Heart: Living Through the Grief of Miscarriage, Stillbirth, or Infant Death , 2000.

    Click here for more information.

     

    Carol Cirulli Lanham. Pregnancy after a Loss: A Guide to Pregnancy After a Miscarriage, Stillbirth or Infant Death , 1999.

    Lanham writes empathetically, and you can relax with her careful and informative text. The book's organization, however, really requires you to read whole chapters to get information. If you want to breeze to pertinent sections and read only those, you will be forced to muddle through quite a bit of text. For a sitting around and lounge read, it makes a good source. Click here for more information.

     

    Kluger-Bell, Kim. Unspeakable Losses: Healing from Miscarriage, Abortion, and Other Pregnancy Loss, 2000.

    Click here for more information.

     

    Douglas, Ann, et all. Trying Again: A Guide to Pregnancy After Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss, 2000.

    Click here for more information.

     

    Berman, Michael R. Parenthood Lost: Healing the Pain after Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Death, 2000.

    Click here for more information.

     

    Other Popular Books

    Semchyscyn, Stefan and Carol Colman. How to Prevent Miscarriage and Other Crisis of Pregnancy , 1990

    A number of people swear by this book and it is one of the best-selling books about miscarriage. It is also very straightforward. Click here for more information.

     

    Eisenberg, Arlene, Murkoff, Heidi, and Hathaway, Sandee. What to Expect When You're Expecting. New York: Workman Publishing, 1996.

    This is the classic book all pregnant women should own. Ask your doctor if he/she will provide you a copy before you buy one. Mine gave me one, so I have two. Click here for more information.

     

    Reiss, Fern, et al. The Infertility Diet: Get Pregnant and Prevent Miscarriage. 1999

    I admit to being pretty skeptical about this book, but it is the top seller for miscarriage books at amazon.com and comes recommended by several important groups, including RESOLVE and INCIID.  Click here for more information.

     

     

    Children's Books

    Molly's Rosebush by Janice Cohn. 

    A children's book that helps children deal with the loss of an unborn sibling. I bought this book for that day when Emily finally asks who Casey is. It is very nicely done, probably geared for the 3-8 age group, and has an introduction for parents. Click here for more information.

     

    Stacy Had a Little Sister A children's book that explains about a sister who dies from SIDS. 
    Waiting for Baby Joe A children's book with photographs of a sibling in neonatal intensive care. 
     
     
     

    Links

    A lifesaving group of women and some of their spouses who will support you, tell you what to expect, and be a ready listener. They also have medical forums where doctors will answer your questions.

    Check their search engine for background information if you'd rather lurk than post.

    An extremely well done web site dealing with all aspects of miscarriage and its aftermath, including a pen pal system for bereaved mothers to contact other bereaved mothers.

    A large, comprehensive miscarriage site with workshops, memorial gardens for baby dedications, and many poems and testimonials from bereaved parents

    An overall parents site with many areas beside just miscarriage. This huge group of women have become a community and often talk to each other on the bulletin boards. Parents Place has a less serious feel than INCIID. 

    Parents Place has two really neat features: A pregnancy calendar that you create will chart your baby's progress for the nine months. I printed one out for Casey to put in his memory box.

    You can certainly just go to their main page and browse around without going directly to the pregnancy loss area, of which there are several.

    A wonderful Christian site with information on how to handle the things people will say to you after a miscarriage, a web ring, music and poetry, and a message about how to become a Christian.

  • Bereaved Moms Share
  • A site that offers an email group, poems and songs, and a gift store where you can purchase prints, jewelry, and other items with a baby and angel theme.

    A nice site to post your miscarriage, stillbirth, or early infant death story and read others.

        Outlines the frequency, causes, and treatment of PROM.

    A mostly Christian site with sections such as, "Why your baby is a  real person." and "How you can know your baby is in heaven." There is also a nice section about what to say to someone who has had a miscarriage.

    Few people know that I am now a baby photographer. Because of Casey, I also do photo restoration and portraits of stillborn babies. This is a free service. Often hospital pictures are not very flattering, and I can usually make them beautiful enough to display or show to other people. You send in the picture by mail (in the US) or scan it and send it by email and I will retouch the photo and email the file back to you.

 

Where does this information come from?

Many people are concerned about the quality of information they receive on the Internet. It is a growing concern that people are getting medical advice from poor sources. This site is written completely by Deanna, the web mistress, who lost her own first baby in 1998. Since then, she has interviewed doctors, read countless books, researched both print and web materials, and talked with several thousand women about their experiences via email. 

One thing we do know is that no one--from the terrified woman who is miscarrying to the revered doctors publishing well researched articles in the New England Journal of Medicine--totally agrees on many facts surrounding miscarriage. It is the intent of this web site to provide the most general and accepted of facts, while realizing that every woman's experience is different, and that statistics such as 1 in 500 don't mean much if you are the 1.

This site is certainly not infallible. The only person who can really tell you what is going on is your own doctor, who peers into your privates with a light and a speculum, who samples your urine, or who presses a sonogram paddle into your belly. If you are in trouble, bleeding, scared, or more depressed than you think you can recover from, you MUST find help. Read and research all you can, but remember that the one-on-one assistance of a real doctor is the only thing that will give you answers that count.

To see my book and web resources, scroll to the top of this page or click here.

 

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